Musings on Shiz

thedailywhat:

Macro of the Day: This should have been his official statement.

[@tanehisi.]

My thoughts exactly! 

subwaydouchery:

SUBWAY DOUCHERY : Conspiracies in Advertising 

Two drinks ago I could still get myself home??? Reeeaaallly, Captain Advertisement?? First of all, mind your own fuggin’ business about my drinkin’! What you been countin’ my drinks, Mr. Clean?!? Go fug yo’self! Second of all, uhhhhhhhh…. Subways are the reason that two drinks ago, I ordered two more drinks! You see any car keys on this fuggin’ key chain?? ** he jangles his key at the advertisement ** NO, YOU DON’T! BECAUSE I DON’T OWN A CAR! I OWN A METROCARD! And Metrocard is my ticket to ride to BoozeTown! Population: uhhh.. ME DRINKIN’! 

We all know what’s really goin’ on here!!! RIGHT EVERYBODY!?!? ** he motions to everyone on the train. Most passengers are avoiding eye contact ** YYYEAAAAHHH!! We all see right through you’re little scheme! This is just a conspiracy by the fuggin’ cab companies to try to guilt me into takin’ one of their Money Sucker Mobiles!!! PFFFFT! NICE TRY!!! DO I LOOK LIKE A MILLIONAIRE?!?!? I’m just fine on this underground roller coaster. ** The doors open behind him and he falls out of the train. After the doors close and the train begins to move, he can be heard chanting, “BUIL-DING SEVEN! BUIL-DING SEVEN!” **

*** Today’s picture came from The Douchery Reserve. Have a wonderful weekend, please drink responsibly, and Keep on Douchin’ ***